I’ve been
25 for 4 months now. It was the age I was kind of scared of approaching – it’s
kind of officially the end of being classed as a young person. You have to
select the next age bracket up on a lot of forms and scroll down a fair ways to
get to your birth year. But I’ve found myself in a really good place and
pondering life fondly. It’s pretty neat. So here are some musings about being
officially ‘not young’ anymore.
1) Staying in and getting drunk is
literally the best thing ever. There’s no overpriced drink or people you don’t
like being twats. Just you and people you’ve chosen to be around. And you can
be in your pyjamas if you want. Winner.
2) There are some things you’re
officially too old to wear. I was scared of this one because I’ve always liked
to be outgoing with my fashion. Luckily you become very self aware of this fact
and wouldn’t chance it anyway – enlightening!
3) You call your parents more than they
call you. And you actually want to talk to them and hear how their day went.
Turns out, they’re pretty fucking cool. Who knew.
4) You stop trying so hard. I’ve come
to the realisation that not everybody is going to like me, and frankly I don’t
really give a shit. I’m comfortable being me after a quarter of a century doing
it and anybody who doesn’t want to be around me is missing out really.
5) You have less friends. And it’s not
entirely a bad thing. The people you’ve stayed in contact with by now are
pretty much friends for life, and it’s kind of comforting and relieving that
the circle of mates you have now are the ones you can go full weird with and
they’re not going to judge you for it – because let’s face it, they’re just as
fucked up as you are.
6) Buying homeware is thrilling as
fuck. Going to IKEA? OH HELL YES. Gunna get me some Billy Bookcases and 50p
hotdogs up in here! I’ve seriously found myself lusting over furniture and
lurking in the homeware sections on websites more so now than ever. And I love
it.
7) You’re more certain of yourself. OK,
it doesn’t apply everywhere (like if you get a new job or whatever) but in most
aspects of your life you knows what you likes and the confidence that comes
with that is super liberating. No longer are you stood in a bar pretending to
be a connoisseur of alcohol and ending up with something that tastes like cat
piss. You go in, order your poison and actually ENJOY it. Yes.
8) You realise that you don’t know
everything. In school and actually, all of my educational life, I was known as
a pretty brainy person. It was quite shocking and unsettling to me then when I
found myself in a new job and I didn’t immediately know everything. But that’s
OK. Whereas in school you’d get a grade to highlight your level of
intelligence, worklife is different, and it’s OK to not have all the answers!
9) Nothing is more satisfying than
tidying your house. OK I still HATE doing it, but the satisfaction after seeing
it all clean is next to nothing.
10) 18 year olds look like PROPER
children. And you wonder how you were allowed to go off and live by yourself at
that age? Seriously?
11) Your favourites bands are now
considered ‘vintage’. I had this epiphany when I had the pleasure of seeing The
Vamps perform a cover of In Too Deep by Sum 41 and they introduced it as an
‘oldie’. Stabbed me right through the heart it did.
12) Everyone around you is getting
married and having babies. And nobody is freaking out about it. Like…it’s
allowed or something? Oh shit, that’s right, because we’re adults now!
13) Nothing is weirder than introducing
someone as your fiancée. I still can’t quite say it without feeling like a
total cringeworthy moron.
14) There are whole worlds you know
nothing about. I’m speaking, of course, about what the young people are into. I
always felt I was pretty on the ball and up to date with this stuff, but we had
a vlogger on park at work when I first started and I had literally never heard
of him and there were kids going into total meltdown about meeting him. Youth
culture is completely off of my radar.
15) The things you say aren’t cool
anymore. You know when your mum used to say ‘OMG’ and you cringed until you
passed out? You do that now. There are phrases in your vocabulary that are so
startlingly uncool you make teenagers die a little inside when you say them.
It’s probably the hardest pill here to swallow.
16) People start talking to you about
mortgages and pensions. And you have no idea about how they work and start
panicking about whether you should. It’s fine though, they probably have no
idea what they’re talking about either. We’re all completely out of our depth
and unequipped for adulthood but it’s cool, we’ll all go down in flames
together as the housing crisis consumes us all. It’s a good life.
17) It’s acceptable for our generation
to cling onto childish things. Like it’s perfectly OK to own a lot of Disney
merchandise and waltz around the kitchen belting out Let It Go. No other
generation has been given that privilege. Embrace it.
18) Most of the shit is basically out of
the way. The crappy relationships, the being a terrible person, the bad fashion
choices. You’ve basically gotten it all out of your system. That’s not to say
you don’t still have the capacity to be a total dick, it’s just you don’t do it
as often.
19) The realisation that you no longer
have to have the cheapest version of everything. Goodbye £2 frying pan from
IKEA that made everything taste like burnt plastic, hello deluxe non-stick Wok
with oak carved handle!
20) Hangovers are real and require
planning for. You basically have to have a day scheduled in for recovery. On
the plus side, you’re responsible enough to have a house stocked with remedies
and a space to curl up and die in where you won’t be disturbed by your mum
hoovering. Swings and roundabouts.
21) You get to tick off the crappest
milestone of them all – you can finally rent a car. Woo? Let’s go down to Hertz
to celebrate, I guess?
22) On the plus side, you’ve probably
been driving long enough now that your once crippling car insurance quote is
now totally manageable. And this brings you great joy, as does shopping around
for the cheapest quote. And the amazing feeling you get when you can smugly
ring your current car insurance company and announce that you’ll be ‘taking
your business elsewhere unless they can match the price.’ You have them in the
palm of your hand, and the sense of power is delightfully overwhelming. Mwahaha!
23) You’re at that horrendous stage
where you look back at old pictures and laugh at how terrible your eyebrows are
whilst simultaneously being acutely aware that you may well be looking back at
your current self in 5 years time with the same embarrassment. But you look
cute now right? Right?
24) You’ve started laughing at some of
those minion memes your mum’s friend posts on Facebook all the time. The horror
is real.
25) You realise you’ve still got a whole
lot of life ahead of you, and whilst the world is definitely a big scary place
and people are less forgiving of you being a clueless dick now that you’re
technically an adult, you can’t wait to go out there and experience as much of
it as you can!
Here's to the next milestone when I can look back at 25 year old me with fondness and disdain!
