French Road Trip - Part Three

This is the last post of a three post series. Check out part one and two before you head on, otherwise this won't make a whole bunch of sense! The day after Disney was a chill day of sorting out car issues, heading into Paris so that the guys could pick up a few creds at Jardin D'Acclimatation (the place has a...colourful history if you fancy investigating) and sashaying around Paris before heading back into Disney Village for some drinks. Honestly, I've never liked Paris but hadn't been in years so wanted to give it another try. The architecture is incredible, really outstanding but there's just something vile about it that leaves me just wanting to get the hell out. Like, we literally saw a man peeing in the middle of the street, not even trying to hide what he was doing. Gross. So yh, not much to say about that one.

The next day was our final one before catching our ferry home later that evening, so it was decided that we'd spend the day at Parc Asterix. I'd been to Asterix  few times before, so again no creds for me here but it's a park I never mind visiting because one of my favourite coaster, Oz'Iris, lives here! And the weather was gorgeous and the park was the quietest I'd ever seen it. Not unbusy by any means but definitely a lot less crowded than my previous visits! 

One annoying thing about Parc Asterix is that if you don't speak French then you'll miss out on a ton of clever jokes in the signage and general theming around the place. It's based on a comic book and as such you'll find lots of quirky little hidden gags around if you look close enough!

The theming is also great. Usually in parks you'll find certain areas looking a little worse for wear than others, but Asterix seems to have consistently excellent standards throughout the park. It's not beautiful or pretty like Disneyland Paris, it's loud, obnoxious and colourful, playing up to its comic book namesake. It's larger than life, silly and fun - everything a theme park should be. On paper I'd argue that it is the perfect theme park in the traditional sense of the word. Excellent, varied ride line-up, bright, colourful and well kept theming and on point staff.

Seriously the staff were fucking amazing during our visit. I've never seen such a consistently thorough and fast team of people doing their best to keep lines moving. Like you could see them getting frustrated when things were taking longer than they should. Which is great, that is absolutely what the attitude should be! 

As I said, I love Oz'Iris, so we had a couple of rides on her. Still as phenomenal, floaty and twisty and just...GOOD as ever. The guys wanted to ride Goudurix, a disgusting Vekoma torture device that deceives its victims into boarding it by presenting a pretty cool layout glistening across the lake. I won't deny that the thing looks enticing, but I've meddled with this beast before and I still don't think my neck has forgiven me. That said, I wasn't about to stand by myself whilst the others rode, so I thought I'd give it another go. Maybe it wouldn't be as bad as I remember? Well yh, it's still a pile of shit but at least this time I knew to brace myself so my neck can at least thank me for that.

Whenever I visit Asterix I insist on riding Transdemonium, the park's resident ghost train and one of my favourite dark rides ever. Which is also such a cred but let's not open that can of worms right now. For me it's exactly how a ghost train should be - like you've entered someone's nightmare. It's totally chaotic, disorienting and lead by a Tim Burtonesque demon puppet creature. I adore it, and implore anyone visiting Asterix not to miss this unique attraction!

The sun was setting, creds were ticked off and we had a two hour drive to Dunkirk ahead of us, so we bid Alex and Michael au revoir before jumping back in the trusty Fiat 500 and heading for the Channel for some excessive border control and racism. 

And that was our French road trip! Not without its hiccups and didn't nab as many creds as I usually would on a European trip, but a great weekend spent spending time with friends and visiting some world class theme parks! 

That's it for European theme parks trips for me until August now. Shocker! Have you visited any of these parks before? Are you planning a trip to any European theme parks this year? Let me know in the comments below, I'd love to have a chat!

Talk later xoxo