I haven't written one of these in a while, I think the last time I sat down and had a look at my theme park bucket list I hadn't been to Japan, so it's definitely in need of an update! There are so many great parks in the world and I like to have a mental list of 'must-visit' parks in my head so I can strategise the best way to visit them all! (And that is the ultimate end goal, crazy as it may be!). So here it is, my theme park bucket list circa May 2016:

1. Cedar Point. Sandusky, Ohio



Yeah as much as I like to think I've ticked off a bunch of American parks I've still not graced America's Roller Coast with my presence. Not for lack of trying, I think every year since probably 2009 I've started the year with every intention of visiting, only for it not to work out. It just looks like a coaster enthusiast's wet dream, coasters as far as the eye can see!

Attraction I most want to ride: Top Thrill Dragster. I love Intamin Accelerators and I've yet to ride one with lapbars. I just need it in my life.

2. King's Island. Mason, Ohio

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Another major US park I'm embarrassed to say I haven't visited. I've been to King's Dominion on the East Coast and it's one of the worst parks I've ever been to, but I've only heard legendary things about this place. Home to some major coasters and general Cedar Fair goodness I need to get my arse over to Ohio pronto!

Attraction I most want to ride: The Beast. At night. I'm told it's spectacular, and it's easy to see why. A massive wooden ride in the darkness, sounds like it ticks every box in my book.

3. Shanghai Disneyland. Shanghai, China

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Unless you've been living under a rock I'm sure you've heard that the sixth Disneyland Park, Shanghai Disneyland, has recently opened. I've tried really hard not to look at the attractions but I recently caved and my god, everything just looks incredible. The place is gorgeous, and really shakes up the stereotypical Disney Park formula in the best way. And it has a pirate themed area so it ticks all the boxes in my book because I love me a pirate theme, especially when Disney does it!

Attraction I most want to ride: Pirates of the Caribbean. I watched a POV and holy shit this thing looks incredible!

4. Gold Reef City, Johannesburg, South Africa

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The set up of this place always sounds like a RollerCoaster Tycoon scenario. It's built on an old working gold mine, how fucking cool is that?! The location is absolutely gorgeous too, it almost rivals Busch Gardens parks for how lush and beautiful they are. Add into that a bunch of really unique and weird looking attractions and the fact that it's a fairly unexplored park in the enthusiast world and it's easy to see why I'm so desperate to visit.

Attraction I most want to ride: Tower of Terror - it's a coaster with an elevator lift in a REAL mine shaft. YES!

5. Chimelong Ocean Kingdom. Guangdong, China

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There are a whole bunch of new parks opening in China that are pulling out all the stops theming wise, but Chimelong Ocean Kingdom knocks it out of the park for me. This place just looks colossal, larger than life and everything a theme park should be. Plus it has an aquarium with whale sharks and a whole other bunch of awesome and unusual ocean creatures.

Attraction I most want to ride: I guess Parrot Coaster, a B&M wing coaster, but if I'm honest this place is all about the theming for me.

6. Canada's Wonderland. Toronto, Canada

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Another coaster mecca (Cedar Fair seem fond of these don't they?). Home to not one but two B&M hyper/giga coasters alongside a whole bunch of coaster classics. Again, it's not the most idyllic place on the planet but let's face it, I'm after the coaster count boost!

Attraction I most want to ride: Hard to decipher between Leviathan and Behemoth, but I'll go with a bigger is better mantra on this one and say Leviathan. Love me some B&M floaty airtime!

7. Ferrari World. Abu Dhabi, United Arab Emirates

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Not only does the fastest coaster in the world live here but they've recently built a Skyrush spinoff with inversions! Add to that a bunch of high tech simulators and racing around the desert at ridiculous speeds I just had to add this one to my list. Plus it'd be cool to ride a coaster in a different setting, I've never been to a desert before!

Attraction I most want to ride: Until recently it was of course Formula Rossa, but as a massive Skyrush fan it's just got to be Flying Aces, it looks incredible!

So that's it. I feel like my list should keep my going until at least 2020, and by then who know, maybe some more world class theme parks will had sprung up for me to visit!

Recently I've been a lot more active on Twitter. It's just a place I can go and surround myself with people I don't necessarily know in person but who fill my feed with good vibes and positivity. I actively try to follow people who inspire me to be a better person and to keep on grinding. And it's really fucking cool. Literally random strangers complimenting each other and boosting each other, it's probably one of the best decisions I've made.

That said, I have noticed something a lot more since becoming more active. Sitting there, intertwined with the girl gang awesomeness and fun times, lies something insidious and frankly quite dangerous. The other day, a girl who I love, an artist who tweets constantly about girl power and female fabness, retweeted another girl who was ragging on somebody for 'over-contouring' (whatever the hell that is). And this reaaalllyyy annoyed me! How could somebody who is usually such an advocate for girl love and ending girl hate, retweet and agree with something that demonises something that girls love?

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Let's put this into context a little bit. There is quite an unfair and irritating trend in our culture that usually looks something like this:

Females: Take an interest in thing
Thing: Becomes a super popular trend
Media: IF YOU LIKE THIS POPULAR THING THEN YOU ARE STUPID
Females: Feel ashamed for liking the thing

You don't want to be like those other stupid girls, right? Good, so here, why don't you take to Twitter and call out your fellow ladies for their interests. Go you!

Well, no. Actually, by giving a negative or snarky comment on what other girls find fun and interesting, and heck, go out of their way to produce content about to share their joy with other like-minded people about, you are just as bad! I see so much hate for contouring on a day to day basis on my social media feeds. Or girls calling other girls out for having bad eyebrows, or not doing their make-up 'right'.

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A few things, then. Firstly, why does what another person does to their face have any effect on your daily life, so much so that you would go out of your way to tweet that said thing annoys you. Why? It literally has no bearing on your existence whatsoever, and I guess if someone's make-up really is offending you that much then just...look away, I guess?

Secondly, make-up is all about expression and art, when you really look at it. And how one experiences art is all down to personal taste. So if you don't like contouring but another person does, that's great! The world would be a very boring place if we all agreed all the time. The trick is to not be an arse about it!

Lastly, don't act like you don't scroll back through your Facebook tagged photos and reel in horror at your 5-years-ago eyebrows. Because we all do. But think back to that time. Didn't you think you looked cool as fuck? Of course you did! So that annoying girl who pissed you off with her contouring so much you had to tweet about it is probably feeling herself right now, and who the hell are you to rain on her parade?

Please stop getting so offended with how others choose to present themselves to the world, and finally, do me a favour. Take a photo of yourself right now. Go on, take one. Bank it away. Then, in five years time, take a look at that photo. I guarantee there will be one thing about your current look that'll have future you going 'girl, what in the HELL were you thinking?!' And that's fine, because right now you've presented yourself to the world how you wanted to today because you think how you look now is cute. And it's true, you do look cute now, because you get to decide what is cute on you and what isn't, not social media or any other bullshit person trying to tell you otherwise.

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Something extraordinary happened to me this weekend. Well, extraordinary in my little world anyway. I finally rode every rollercoaster in the UK! Avid readers of my blog will remember a personal goal I set for myself last year, which didn't come to fruition because 2015 tried to fuck me sideways. But finally, after seven years of painstaking trip planning, scouring Coaster-Count and RCDB for updates of new coasters for me to hungrily chomp my way through and finally I've done it. All those little boxes are ticked and I can scroll happily through Coaster-Count without a hint of the dreaded red blob telling me what precious coasters were missing from my most unusual collection.


It's a great feeling, achieving small, personal goals. I assume this is what dieters feel when they finally hit their goal weight, after tediously planning and assessing their journey until finally they do it. But, unlike a dieter, mine is an achievement not shared my many. Nor is it cared for by many. Which is fine, because let's face it, it's a bit odd! If I were to tell a 'normal' that I've ridden every coaster in the UK their reaction is usually firstly one of confusion ('You actually spend your time doing that? Even the little kiddie ones?') and then this is usually followed with 'Oh, that's really cool!'. To which I always reply the same. No. No it's not. It's the opposite of cool. It's geekiness at it's most extreme. And that is OK.


As I've explained previously, I feel like we should all embrace our nerdiness. Now is a better time than any, a golden age for the previously shunned and socially outcast. We live in a time where the geek is put up on a pedestal and embraced rather than mocked, and that is a truly marvellous thing. What's better than finding a like-minded bunch of people to sit and geek-out with about the one thing you thought made you stranger than your average human. And I feel like this little victory of mine has earned me a place in the UK coaster-enthusiast hall of fame. Well, for at least the short time between now and when the new coasters open at Paultons Park in a couple of weeks.


And that's fine too. I am a coaster enthusiast. I live for this shit. Nothing fills my heart with joy more than scrolling through the various coaster-listing sites to find a new rollercoaster has opened at some godforsaken part of the UK. I'll get chatting to my friends, we'll scour through our calendars, find when we're all free, jump in the car and drive to whatever weird and wonderful forgotten seaside town that has for some reason decided to invest in a Big Apple. It would be a very sad day for me indeed if this were it.


And whilst the ticked boxes and completed spreadsheet is immensely satisfying to behold, it's definitely the journey and the memories associated with achieving all of those credits that make this all worthwhile. Never have I laughed so hard or indulged in pure silliness as I have on a cred-run around the UK. And the bonding too. You find a lot out about a person when you're stuck in a car to Bridlington or Porthcawl with them for hours on end. I know a few enthusiasts who endeavour to conquer the UK coasterscape solo - which is fine, more power to you. But the comradery that comes part and partnership with this hobby is for me what it's truly all about.


So thank you. Thank you all of your who have shared the petrol money, begged for us to be let into non-childless adult friendly parks and shared their stories to pass the dreaded hours of motorway travel. It's been a fucking blast over these past seven years or so and I can't wait to keep ploughing away with you all at our weird and wonderful hobby.